It was his eyes that led me to betray my King. His captivating eyes. Brown. That stirred my soul with every look. My mind played a reoccurring tape of our kisses that almost were, for only in my dreams the kisses were reality.
Never before had I dared to fellowship with anyone not of my Lord's Kingdom. Not on this level. Not without clear boundaries and controls. Not without the King's agenda at heart, to win and save the lost. It was his eyes. And his smile. The way he walked and talked and made me feel. He sought my friendship, and I freely gave it. Wasn't it only proper for a King's daughter to smile and be cordial in return to such kindness?
He respected my King and my allegiance to my King's Kingdom, but he clearly held separate views. Life became a whirlwind, for I considered these other views and discovered how little I knew about my Lord's Law. How unnerving because the Law was my life! Chastisement from my royal brothers filled my ears as I questioned the Law: its origin, its purpose, and worst of all, its validity. Their critical words drove me to rebel even more, and I sought comfort in my King's enemy. At night visions of those brown eyes replaced my meditations of my King and my King's agenda.
Inviting him to dine with me was innocent enough, but I was not ready for the unexpected attraction I felt. Liking his eyes was one thing. I was merely admiring my King's creation. But looking beyond the beauty of his eyes, something in his soul sparked a flame inside of me. It all felt so innocent and natural. I found myself thinking, 'What would be the harm in giving myself to this man just once?' My heart said to follow it. It beat louder and louder. And my mind urged me to use reason and good judgment. I'll admit, it was hard to be strong. But still uncertain about the validity of the Law, I didn't not want to take any chances, for I knew the punishment of a living a life in breech of the King's law was death. So that night I did not allow the enemy to get any closer than his gentle caresses and warm embraces. This was the night that our kisses almost were. So tell me, why do I cry if I am happily serving my King? I'm doing what is right, yet my heart cries. It cries his name!
My strength grew weak and my faith in my King's Law grew dimmer as the King permitted a traitor to deceive me. I do not speak now of the one with the pretty brown eyes, but another who pretended to be one my Lord's servants, a knight in the royal court. Someone who I did not desire in any way or ever would. Someone who I believed and trusted. I trusted him entirely too much, and he tricked me. He did to me, without permission what I had rebelliously thought of doing with the one with pretty eyes.
Hurt, I sought out the King's enemy and reported my misfortune. How could my King allow this to happen to me? Granted, I had gone outside of the Kingdom walls, but despite my rebellion, wasn't He still watchful over me? Then, as quickly as the sun arose in the morning, the comfort I found in the King's enemy turned to pain. I discovered that he truly was an Enemy. He had lied and deceived me too, for he said he had exchanged vows with no woman, but in fact he was betrothed to many. And he showed his evilness more and more each day in subtle ways. I had no one but my King.
Still afraid to return to the Kingdom and approach the castle where my King lived, I hung dearly to His Word, the many words written for me in the Bible. I studied its truths, became a student of the Law, and rediscovered with the help of some royal friends that the Law was true and correct, that I had only been blinded by a set of beautiful brown eyes. Now studied and equipped, I know My King's Law to be true, not only what it says, but why, and how to prove it. Since these days that I am describing, I have made peace with those who chastised me. Most importantly I have made peace with my King.
I don't think much of those eyes anymore. The brown ones. Or the dark ones that had their way with me. I don't blame my King, for His Law told of the consequences of keeping bad company. Bad company corrupts good character and good judgment. Trying to share my Lord's Law with someone who does not know it is one thing. Enjoying the warm embrace and gentle caress of the Lord's Enemy is entirely another! And I should have known better than to trust a man with dark eyes, who I had never seen before. Oh Father, my King, I may never leave your castle again now that I have returned! For truly your strong tower offers me protection. And just being in your castle I feel safe and sound by knowing you are there. Hearing your voice resound through the corridors sets me at rest, for I know Thou art with me.
I am mindful again now of the Kingdom's agenda, my King's plan for ruling the Earth. I strive to uphold His every law. Some things are hard still. I will admit. For now I have seen another set of eyes, eyes of a man of God, a true bondservant of my King, who endears me, yet it's hard to look into his eyes, no matter how lovely. Yes, I desire royal children one day. But I'd rather continue my focus on the Kingdom's agenda. Unless I see the King's reflection inside the set of eyes that looks upon me so lovingly, I cannot look back. For only a fool repeats his folly returning to it like a dog who comes back to his vomit. I want to be called prudent. I want to be known as a virtuous woman, mature in the way I carry myself, for I represent the great King, and want to represent well. I will go before my King and advise Him of my desire. Surely He will grant me no bad thing.
Eyes. The window to one's soul. Be careful what you look upon. Don't be foolish like me and think you can keep company with the King's Enemy. And if you are an Enemy of my King, you should know that my King has the biggest and best army. The best agenda. And the most power. And also truth. The truth that will set you free. The King's Law is all truth and nothing but the truth.