My hubby recently showed me an article written online by an “annonymous” single person who says she’s saved and having sex without regret. She boldly writes (if you consider annonymous authors to be bold),
I’m single. I’m saved (as in born-again Christian). And I have sex. Unapologetically.
The name of the article is, “Single, Saved, and Sexin’: The Gospel of Gettin’ Your Freak On.” (To read it, click the below screenshot.)
I welcome comments from everyone about this article. First, here’s my comments.
In general, I felt the author’s perspective mirrors the world’s perspective on this very issue. I saw no distinction.
(By “world,” I simply mean what the Bible means when using that word: people who are not followers of Christ; unregenerated.)
- John 3:16-17: For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world , but to save the world through him.
- John 15:19: If you belonged to the world , it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world , but I have chosen you out of the world . That is why the world hates you.
- John 17:14-18: I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of it.
On the other hand, I appreciate the author’s transparency and authenticity regarding the “struggle,” because it’s real.
I was “saved and single” until age 32 when I got married. (Here’s my “testimony” on waiting.) So I can relate. But the bifocals this author uses to view her fellow single saved sisters who are “staying strong and waiting” seems to be the same eye prescription of the world: I want what I want when I want it. (Or in the words of my friend’s 4-year-old son, “Waiting is not awesome; it’s so hard to wait.”)
I also feel the need to define what I mean by “saved” which may differ from the article’s definition. To me, being saved or being a Christian is not a casual, “I believe in God.” (After all, even the demons in hell believe in God! Read James 2:19.)”
On the contrary, it should be a belief so strong that it impacts your entire lifestyle, your way of living and thinking. We are all sinners saved by grace, those of us who are “saved.” We are not sinless. We just sin less. And we have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. That’s the missing ingredient for a lot of professing Christians who attend church regularly believing they are saved simply because they believe in God.
It seems this topic remains of interest, even explosive in some Christian circles, decade after decade, particularly if “masturbation” comes up: is masturbating wrong or right, for single or married people (that’s a whole other sub-topic). Most people are pretty dogmatic about their views one way or the other. But this discussion about being “saved, single, and celebate” has often led me to wonder about Bible Days, the time period upon which the Bible was written.
In Bible days, people were often married before they even hit puberty. So this issue wasn’t much of a dilemma then since there wasn’t massive unmarried people with a need for sex who couldn’t satisfy that need.
(I use the word “need” because a single friend of mine pointed out that people tend to use the word “need” for married people but characterize the same need as a “desire” when talking about a single person. But really it’s a God-given need He created in all human persons. Sex is so much more than about procreation, even from a biblical standpoint. Sex does the body good! God created it to feel good but also be medicinal on many levels: physically, mentally, emotionally, and even spiritually.)
Far be it from me to say that the God-inspired Word is not relative to the cultures of today’s world. I can hear a preacher booming now, “God is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow! Can I get an amen? His Word never changes. God is good alllllllllllllll the time!” True. But we must remember to practice good exegesis and be hermeneumically correct (yes, I went to Bible school). Is the original intent and context of the Bible authors who wrote about these topics still applicable to a society where the average person doesn’t wed until late 20s and early 30s. (I’m playing the devil’s advocate here!)
So I open up the floor. What are your thoughts on this topic? What do you think about the article written by the annonymous author on The Crunk Feminist Collective website? (By the way, this is only the first article in a series that the Crunk website is doing. Not sure if the other articles will be authored by (professing) Christians or what the other points of views on this topic will be (for or against sex outside of marriage), but should be interesting nonetheless.
P.S. If you see any weird or crazy books advertised below this post, please know that I’m trying to get that fixed!